As Camille noted in her “Body Surfing for Boomers” post, one of our big challenges was letting our values drive our responses and actions to the tsunamis we had experienced. While we recognized that we needed to “ride the wave,” it was still a struggle to find a balance between head and heart.
In our hearts, we’ve known – from the beginning – that this was the right move. We need to make this move to Maine; we can feel it; we need to define our purpose. On the other hand, there are all these “head” issues that focus on the everyday things we will need to address: what will we do, who will we do it for, where will we live, etc.: All those things that smart people plan for in preparing for big lifestyle changes.
Interestingly, we’re just now coming into convergence on head and heart balance. Most of the time, we’ve been at polar opposites: Camille would be on the heart side, I’d be on the head side. Then we’d convince the other of our point of view and switch – she’d then be on the head side, me on the heart side.
The other interesting aspect (at least for me) was that whichever one of us was more head focused, was more anxious. We worried about those things that smart people worry about; we never came up with the answers, but they took up a lot of our energy and concern.
In the past few weeks, as our time draws closer to leaving, we’ve come together more around the head – heart balance. We feel we’re pretty well prepared to make this move in the way in which we want. We’ll have the resources to take a significant time off to reset and refresh. We’ve come to terms with a lifestyle that will enable us to do so. We’re not blindly marching into the fray; we’re not as prepared as others might be, but we’re good enough and that’s what counts.
A good example is our recent reconnaissance trip to Maine, ostensibly to find a place to live. We had a set of criteria: hardwood floors, claw foot tub, reasonable rent, inspiring neighborhood. As you can imagine, we looked at a number of apartments in different parts of town. None of the initial places we visited met our expectations. We were getting pretty discouraged. Finally, the last place we looked at we knew was the place for us. It met our basic criteria and then some. It wasn’t perfect, but we weren’t settling either. This place will be good for us. It will allow us to do what we need to do. It will be good enough to inspire us.
How have been you handled the “head – heart” challenges in your life? Do you look for balance or do you let one drive your behavior over the other?
We’d love to get your feedback on our “journey” as well as hear about your own journey in new directions. Please use the comment section below to share your thoughts and ideas.
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